Who The Hell is Dr. Phil?

While walking my final mile on a tread mill, I intended to run three but wussed out, I watched Dr. Phil. Fortunately there was no volume, so I heard no hypocrasy. Yet he had the audacity to talk about how we can better our marriages with a local reporter from Philly.

I thought I had a huge ego and loved to hear myself speak. I didn't read any closed captions mentioning how he screwed up his first marriage, nor did I see it mentioned. Perhaps he did and I blocked it out, I'm proactively trying to forget what I did see.

This is the same guy who can teach me how to lose weight! Although we're the same height, he is 30 pounds heavier than me! If only Oprah would give me her blessing and I could cure America with Snake Oil! Prior to this diatribe, my personal prophet Ben Franklin brought these maxims to my troubled mind:
"Sound , & sound doctrine, may pass through a Ram's Horn and a Preacher,
without straightening the one, or amending the other."
"Altho' thy teacher act not as he preaches
Yet ne'ertheless, if good, do what he teaches
Good counsel, failing men may give, for why,
He that's aground where the shoal doth lie."

After this severe chastisement, I perceived that Dr. Phil may actually help people, though I would recommend using Body for Life by Bill Phillips instead. The only wrong choice is setting on the sofa watching Oprah with a bon-bon.